Friday, 19 February 2016

Acceptance

A friend had posted this meme on Facebook the other day.





It struck a chord with me because the ongoing process of accepting has been an important part of helping me cope with living with a chronic illness for so long.

When I was young I didn't have concrete plans for how my life would go, but I would envision myself in the future, and never once did I envision a future where I would be incapacitated for years. 
I waltzed through my teenage years and early twenties taking for granted the body that allowed me to walk, run and dance whenever I wanted. I worked, I served, I played and lived life as fully as I knew how. 

Overnight it changed and once I was fed up of mourning I realised that I had to adjust to a new life.

Accepting things as they are is hard especially when it seems like you're accepting something that nobody else has to accept.  It's far easier to compare your life to those around you and feel hard done by.



However, acceptance becomes easier if we persist with it and realise, as the quote says above, that there is a way through it.

I find it important that I don't spend all day 'logged on' to social media. Although this is my main link to a social life, it isn't real life and seeing everyone's successes leaves me demoralised.

One of the hardest things I have to do, but imperative to managing my condition, and to accepting my circumstances, is to live within my limitations. If I boom and bust (which happens more than I'd like to admit) the physical payback makes me resentful of my limitations again. When I pace myself and live within my limitations I feel physically better and can cope better emotionally.

Then, for me, it is a matter of changing perspective. I think it's a case of losing that sense of entitlement to an easy life, and getting rid of the idea that other people have an easier or better life. I don't know of one person that isn't going through one trial or another. We can't compare them because we all have our crosses to bear.

I love this quote I found here

Of course there is no formula for success except, perhaps, an unconditional acceptance of life and what it brings.” ~Arthur Rubinstein

I would class a successful life as a HAPPY life, and I'm learning the hard way that happiness is a choice. We cannot be happy if we don't accept our circumstances beyond our control. As the Mindfulness Jar tweeted

'Make the most of now - that is all there ever is'

What do you think? Has acceptance been easy for you? Share your experiences in the comments below.

Monday, 15 February 2016

ChloeClik Art






 Hello, my names ChloeClik, I’m 23 years old, an artist, photographer, writer, singer musician, day dreamer and all round love of life. I also have CFS M.E and fibromyalgia and asthma. My illness and passions are in constant battle together, some days I can go out take lots of photos and some days I’m stuck at home with agonising pain unable to barely lift my camera. The same applies with everything, guitar and singing. It’s tough and it’s like being stuck on one of those vertical rollercoasters it’s going up and down and up and down. 

But this isn’t going to be a negative blog post, in fact I’m going to say what good things my M.E has done for me. It might seem surprising, surely an illness as horrible as M.E wouldn’t have done any good but when you’re ill like that and your body has turned against you you survive by seeking out the positive moments and letting it empower you and inspire you to not give in. 




I guess I should start at the beginning. I was a really happy, energetic child who loved life, school and was practically bouncing off the walls. Then M.E struck. Age eight I was suddenly in so much pain, I couldn’t walk, couldn’t go to school. Couldn’t do anything. A big black curtain had just come thump over my future and I was just faced with a black square of despair. But, it was in that black square that I found my love of art. I’d always enjoyed drawing and writing but feeling so ill this was now the only thing I could do. So I drew and I wrote and when I was too ill to do even that I’d lie on my back in my bed day dreaming stories and fantasy worlds that I’d one day put onto paper. 





First I started with pencil drawings and I’d turn my hands black with graphite, I did that for years. Mum always said ‘Draw colour, bring it to life.” Personally I loved black and white but one day I drew a lion. I put it on this art website and was sad it didn’t really get many favourites. So in a spur of inspiration I got my pack of watercolours and brought it to life. Suddenly the favourites were flooding in and this lion is my most popular image so far. For my birthday my family had it printed as A3 and placed in a regal black frame on my wall. Every time I see that lion and his wise eyes I see my whole life in him and how what started in black and white turned into a world of colour. 




I also really got into photography, so much in fact that I want to make that my career as well as being an author and illustrator. I can’t do the photography part just yet because of my health but in the meantime I’m studying a photography degree from home through the Open College of the Arts which I absolutely love. 




When I was eight I had one big dream, pass all my exams, go to University, get married, travel the world in a combi like the Wild Thornberries. M.E stopped me doing all of that. But when I look back I see how I have fulfilled the first few of those dreams, just in a non conventional way. I could only do two GCSE but I passed  I get to do my Uni course from home and I have traveled the world through all my books and art. As for the combi and travelling the world, well I’m learning to drive and that’s something I thought I’d never be well enough to do. So who knows 


You can see my art in multiple places, I’m mostly active on Instagram, ChloeClik and Facebook ChloeClikArt and some of my art is available on Society6